The Wager
by Kyra3
Summary: ONE SHOT. House decides to have some fun at the Christmas fundraiser.


Disclaimer: The characters of House,MD belong to David Shore. I just like to play with them!

The Wager

The moment House walked in the room, he knew it was going to be hell. He scowled as a snow machine blew a cloud of fake snow into his face. What the hell was Cuddy thinking? House pulled awkwardly at the bow tie round his neck and glared at a couple of interns who happened to look his way.

"House."

House turned to look at Wilson stood beside him, "What the hell is this?"

"A 'Winter Wonderland' I believe," Wilson replied, glancing at his friend before taking in the scene before him.

The hospital lobby had been decorated with Christmas trees and fake snow while the snow machine blew more around, covering the guests. In one corner, was a grotto where Santa sat handing out gift bags to passing patrons and members of staff.

Wilson raised an eyebrow before commenting, "At least there's an open bar."

"The woman really is the devil."

"Yes, and spreading Christmas cheer is pure evil," another voice snarked back from in front of them.

House looked up to see Cuddy approaching them. She was wearing a purple, calf length dress. The deep v-neck and empire line emphasised her cleavage, something that did not escape House's notice.

"Yup, just like letting the girls get cold like that is!" House smirked.

Cuddy glared at House before heading towards the entrance where a potential donor had just entered.

House watched as she sashayed away and then turned to Wilson, a smirk on his face. "Let's make this more interesting. Care for a small wager?"

"What do you have in mind?"

"A race."

"A race? Seriously?"

"Yup. First across the finish line wins."

"And the finish line is…"

"Janitors' closet. With Cuddy."

"WHAT? House, that is insane."

"I didn't say you had to do anything in said closet. Although, that could be fun…" House waggled his eyebrows.

"What's in it for me?"

"Clinic hours. I win, you do mine for a month. You win, I do you yours…well, my team does."

Wilson looked over to where Cuddy stood laughing with some of the nurses. '"Okay, you're on. Rules?"

"Anything goes."

House watched as Wilson headed over to join Cuddy. He grinned and made a beeline for the bar to put his plan into motion.

* * *

Cuddy paused briefly as one of the waiters automatically re-filled her wine glass. "Er, thanks." She hasn't realised her glass was empty. To be honest, it seemed that it hadn't been empty all night. She shrugged and took a sip.

"Cuddy, have you got a minute?"

Cuddy turned to find Wilson at her elbow with a worried look on his face. "Sure, what's up?"

"I err…well…" he paused, his face reddening.

"James?"

"It's Chase."

"What about him?

"He's er…got his foot stuck…in a bucket."

"How the hell has Chase got his foot stuck in a bucket?"

"He and Cameron were…you know…in the janitors' closet. It seems things got heated and well…he got stuck in a bucket."

Cuddy looked at him incredulously, "Well, Chase seems fine to me." She nodded her head over to where the doctor in question stood with Cameron and Foreman.

"I…err…yes, well, I should check," Wilson mumbled, quickly moving away.

"What did you do to Jimmy?" House asked as he approached her.

"No idea…" she shook her head, not noticing as the waiter filled her glass again.

* * *

An hour later, House was sat at the bar nursing a glass of scotch. He smirked as he watched Cuddy. His plan to win the bet was in full flow and he was certainly enjoying the show. By now, Cuddy was completely unaware that she was already on her fourth glass of wine and was currently stood further along the bar telling a joke; a particularly filthy joke, so it seemed. She reached the punch line and threw her head back as she joined in the raucous laughter of her audience.

"Round two begins," House muttered to himself as Wilson approached Cuddy again.

Wilson led Cuddy onto the dance floor just as Shakira's 'Hips Don't Lie' started to play. He grinned over at House who then swore when he realised what Wilson was about to do. Salsa. Wilson, unfortunately, had disturbingly agile hips that, when used, had a rather bizarre effect on women. However, House grinned as he watched Cuddy start to move. There was no denying that that ass was made for salsa!

* * *

Cuddy was certainly surprised when Wilson pulled her onto the dance floor. She was even more surprised when he started to lead her into a salsa. Not that she was complaining though; she loved to salsa and Wilson definitely knew how to impress. She laughed as he pushed her out into a double turn before pulling her back into a wrap. She leant back against his chest, twisting her hips before he led her into another turn. Cuddy glanced over to the bar where she saw House sitting, clearly ogling her. She smirked as Wilson led her into a shine; now she could have some fun. She moved into a 'Suzy Q' and then stepped forward, hooking her right leg around his left leg. Wilson rotated his hips, pulling her closer as she balanced on one leg.

* * *

House grimaced at how close Wilson and Cuddy were and how much _she_ seemed to be enjoying it. He watched as Wilson's hands skimmed over Cuddy's hips and scowled as she rolled them in response. Damn, it was turning him on and he wasn't even dancing! The music came to an end and the couple finished with a simple lean and House scowled as Wilson winked at him. Game on.

House got up and followed the pair as Wilson pulled Cuddy out into the lobby. Cuddy was a little worse for wear but seemed to be immune to Wilson's charms. House snorted as he heard Cuddy protest loudly.

"Wilson, what is so interesting about the janitors' closet?"

"It's err…private?"

"It's a closet."

"I thought you might like to…well, you know…find out how private it is…"

He stopped as Cuddy failed to contain her laughter, "Yeah, maybe we could!"

"Really? Well..ah.."

She giggled at his shocked expression. "Well, maybe next year…you never know, I might be your secret santa," she continued and raised an eyebrow.

"I…err…" Wilson spluttered in surprised.

"Merry Christmas, James," she said, kissing his cheek before returning to the party.

House approached Wilson with a smirk on his face, "Smooth, Jimmy."

"Shut up, House."

"Seriously, sex in the janitors' closet. Now why didn't I think of that? Maybe you should have invited Chase and Cameron?" House wiggled his eyebrows.

"I'd like to see you try."

"That sounds like a challenge to me."

Wilson snorted, "Seriously, the only way she is getting in that closet is if she is dragged in."

House raised an eyebrow and limped back into the ballroom leaving Wilson with a look of surprise on his face.

* * *

House glanced around the room in search of Cuddy but couldn't see her amongst the crowd of people. He paused as he caught a flash of purple striding, well, stumbling towards the ladies' room. House slowly followed her, grabbing another glass of wine from a passing waiter. He stopped outside the bathroom and pressed his ear against the door before pushing it open.

"One way or another, I'm gonna find ya. I'm gonna getcha, getcha, getcha, getcha…"

House could barely contain his laughter at what he saw before him. Cuddy was standing in the middle of the room in front of the mirror, brandishing, what could only be described as a toilet brush.

"_One way or another, I'm gonna win ya. I'm gonna getcha, getcha, getcha, getcha…"_

Cuddy continued to sing into the toilet brush as she danced, unaware of her audience until he let out a loud snort. She spun around on one heel to find House recording her on his cell phone.

"Aww, don't stop now, Cuddles, the girls were just starting to enjoy themselves!"

Cuddy walked unsteadily up to him, "Give me the phone, House."

"Nope, gotta go get this on Youtube." He stepped backwards as Cuddy made a grab for the phone.

She made another attempt at reaching for it and swore loudly as she lost her balance and fell into his arms.

House leered down at her, enjoying the view of her cleavage, "Looks like the twins have been enjoying their night out! You know, Cuddy, you really need to learn to hold you booze." He watched as she steadied herself, keeping hold of one of her arms.

"Give. Me. The. Phone."

House simply smirked at her before exiting the bathroom. This was it: the perfect opportunity to win the bet. He tucked his cell into his pocket and limped back into the lobby. He noticed Wilson standing by Santa's grotto flirting openly with one of the elves.

"The next Mrs Wilson, perhaps?" House shouted loudly, causing the people around him to stop and stare. "You should get him in a janitors' closet, he's _wild_!"

With that, House limped down a hallway in search of the finishing line.

Cuddy rubbed her temples with frustration. The fundraiser was not going how she wanted to it. Why couldn't House just behave? He just had to make things difficult. And drag Wilson into it. She sat down at the bar, feeling a little unsteady.

"Cuddy? You ok?"

Cuddy looked to see Wilson sitting next to her, offering her a glass of wine.

"What do you want?" She slurred slightly, taking the drink.

"I'm, err, sorry for what I said, you know, earlier?"

Cuddy shrugged.

"It was some stupid idea that House had."

Cuddy looked at him, "I should have known. Gee, it's like having a twelve year old…" she was interrupted by her cell phone going off. She pulled it out and frowned at the photo that had been sent to her. "I am going to _kill_ him. In fact, I am going to kill him _in_ the janitors' closet that _you_ seem obsessed with, Wilson."

Wilson almost choked on his drink at the mention of the closet, "Where are you going?"

"To kill House," Cuddy muttered and she stalked out of the room, swaying a little on her stilettos.

A few minutes later, Cuddy found herself standing outside a janitors' closet. She pulled out her cell and looked at the photo. Yes, this was definitely the right one. She leant against the door as her everything started spinning. How many glasses of wine had she drunk? Cuddy closed her eyes but that just made the spinning worse. She hadn't had this much to drink in years.

Suddenly, the door to the closet was wrenched open and Cuddy let out a squeal as she found herself falling backwards. However, her fall was broken by something large and soft that then proceeded to pull her into the closet. She let out another scream that was quickly muffled by a large hand. Her eyes widened as a voice whispered in her ear, "Have you been naughty or nice this year, Cuddy?"

Cuddy pulled out the man's grip and turned to face him, "What the hell…House?" She stifled a laugh as she saw him. Some how, he had stolen a Santa suit and was now dressed from head to foot in the festive costume.

"Why the hell are you dressed as Santa and why have you dragged me in here…" Cuddy was cut off by House's mouth crashing down on to her own. She had barely registered what was happening before he stepped back and he pulled out a sprig of mistletoe, "Happy Christmas, Cuddy."

House pushed open the door and nudged her out. Cuddy blushed as she came face to face to Wilson who simply stared at her in shock. House followed her out of the closet and smirked at Wilson, "And that, my friend, is how it's done! Have fun in the clinic!" With that, he limped off down the hall, "Merry Christmas, and to all, a good night!"


End file.
